Dysfunctional Anger

By Bob Vass, MEd, PLPC, NCC

So it is with dysfunctional anger – with one significant difference. That kind of anger also affects more than just the perpetrator; it can destroy relationships and ruin families.

There is a distinction between anger as a normal human reaction and anger that turns into irrational rage.  Healthy anger is intentional and appropriately proportionate to a provocation.  It responds to a clear danger or a threatening circumstance.  Unhealthy anger is too intense, and it often lasts too long or happens too frequently.  Anyone can become angry on occasion for either good or bad reasons.  Yet, the person who cannot seem to control his or her temper is suffering from dysfunctional anger, also known as rage.  That’s the kind of anger we’re discussing here. To some, dysfunctional anger may seem to be like an untamable wild beast; on the contrary, it is one that can be brought under control with professional help.

Certainly, the problem of irrational anger is nothing new.  The Medieval Church labeled anger as one of the Seven Deadly Sins, and long before that, the Bible identified anger as something that one should keep in check. The New Testament states,  “Be quick to hear, slow to speak, and slow to anger” (James 1:19).

There is no one kind of dysfunctional anger.  Actually, it has quite a wide spectrum.  At one extreme is the highly serious and clinically diagnosable “Intermittent Explosive Disorder.” (described by the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM, 5th Edition, p. 466, Code 312.34). This disorder is the manifestation of impulsive and explosive anger; it is a lack of impulse control, which results in aggressive behavior, serious assaults, or the destruction of property.  Although rare when compared to the rest of the spectrum, this disorder often must be clinically treated, and it frequently requires strong medication.

More common are the other unhealthy styles of anger., which can appear as aggressive behavior, domestic violence, fist fights, road rage, verbal abuse, bullying, intimidation and so on.  All of these dysfunctions are treatable.  An individual prone toward anger can watch for triggers—e.g., tension in the forehead, rapid heart beat, a knot in the stomach, racing thoughts, and many other indicators. Some have been helped by self-help methods, such as mindfulness meditation, relaxation exercises,  visualizing a calmer experience from the past, or counting to ten.

Those who know their anger problem is beyond their ability to control need not give up.  The counselors at Agape Christian Counseling  have techniques that can help clients learn how to control their anger.  For example, trained therapists may use cognitive behavior therapy, or they may use other techniques such as dialectical behavior therapy.

Without a doubt, anger is a problem we see all around us in American society, but  dysfunctional anger is not something that a person has to live with, for it can be conquered.   The Bible states, “One who is wise can go up against the city of the mighty and pull down the stronghold in which they trust” (Proverbs 21:22).  Likewise, dysfunctional anger is a mighty emotion, but it can – and must – be controlled and ultimately defeated so that it isn’t controlling your life and destroying relationships with those around you.