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Accentuate the Positive
In the year 1944, during a dark time for families and the country, singer and songwriter Johnny Mercer wrote what would be one of the war’s most iconic songs of hope and inspiration: “Accentuate the Positive, Eliminate the Negative.” Why did this song become such an anthem of encouragement? Because through the power of music, the lyrics reminded the country that vision, hope, and inspiration are achieved by dwelling on those things which are good, excellent and praiseworthy. We can all have seasons in our life, our families, and our relationships that can be an unfamiliar, dark place. During these times, it can be human nature to lean toward negative…
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Helicopter Mode: Who’s It For… Really?
When we love and are committed to our family members, we want to ensure their success and happiness. It’s natural at times, however, that we may feel responsible, or be made to feel responsible, for the failures or unhappiness of those we love. This can include both our children and our spouse. Feelings of responsibility for another person’s emotions and behaviors can drive us into guilt, which may challenge our own personal boundaries. Before you know it, we might be climbing into the rescue helicopter and dialing the automatic pilot to the “No Boundaries Mode” so that we are always emotionally available to the other person. Now don’t get me wrong. Being emotionally available is a…
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Conflict Avoidance : Always Speak The Truth, Even If Your Voice Shakes
Have you ever avoided conflict in a relationship? Struggled with using your voice? Chances are, there have been times when either you have been reluctant to deal with conflict or you have been in a relationship with someone who has. Conflict avoidance is common in relationships and families. We may avoid conflict with our spouse and even our children. We might avoid conflict out of fear of a loved one’s reaction, be it one of anger, hurt, disappointment, judgment, rejection or criticism, just to name a few possibilities. We might lack knowledge about how to tolerate the emotional distress that the conflict may bring to us. If we don’t know…
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Intimate Communication: Let’s Talk About Sex
When a couple is in a long-term monogamous relationship, symptoms affecting sexuality as the result of medical issues, chronic illness or disability, or even natural aging, are inevitable. Naturally, as we pass through life, our bodies experience physiological changes which affect our sexual functioning. Physiological changes might include pregnancy and nursing, coronary artery disease, cancer treatments, arthritis and chronic pain, injuries, diabetes, multiple sclerosis, aging, prostate problems or autoimmune disorders. Learning how to navigate through these changes by means of communication and compassion can be helpful for the sexual relationship. Medical issues, chronic illness, disability and aging are all capable of affecting the sexual relationship and can create symptoms that…
Marriage Family & Individual Counseling | St Louis MO
